I Got Nothing Here

Seriously, this actual letter from Michelle Bachmann (R-Land of Oz), leaves me without a proper rejoinder.

I know that there should be some sort of rejoinder to this, something witty and devastating, but the stupidity, and self-centered immaturity stun me, and I've got a 12 year old daughter:

Don't let them Palinize me!

Dear Friend:

Last month, I appeared on Sean Hannity's show on Fox News Channel. I was talking about the Democrats' latest scheme to pick the taxpayer's pocket to pay for a $1.5-billion slush fund for ACORN.

Before getting into the meat of this terrible new anti-taxpayer proposal, Sean Hannity said that he considers me "the second most hated Republican woman," second only to Governor Sarah Palin.

With Governor Palin taking a well-deserved step out of the spotlight, it appears that I may be absorbing even more of the liberals' scorn.

And, I'd really appreciate your support so that I can defend myself against their attacks. Click here to make a donation!

I'm out there every day speaking the truth about their attempts to guide this nation into socialism:

• Their government-run health care proposal that will put government bureaucrats in between you and your doctor and end up rationing care -- and the most vulnerable will suffer first and most.

• Their cap-and-trade national energy tax that will drive up energy costs for every American and send our jobs overseas.

• Their spending spree that has pushed the national budget deficit over the $1 trillion mark for the first time in our history. We're already closing in on $2 trillion and there's no end in sight to their spending.

• Their dozens of White House czars with power over your lives and futures and absolutely no accountability to Congress or the people.

• And, speaking of unaccountable -- when are they going to open up the Fed's books to the public?

• Their political patronage to groups like ACORN -- doling out billions of your tax dollars and partnering with them to collect your private information for the Census.

But just as they did with Sarah Palin, the more I talk about the issues, the more they attack with below-the-belt personal hits. In fact, yesterday, a Minnesota paper gave a full column to a hit piece on one of my kids!

Can you help me to defend against these attacks? Click here to make a donation! [Yeah, like I'd supply a frelling link to that nutjob]

I'll tell you the truth: Their sticks and stones will not stop me from going out and speaking the truth about their bad policies! And, your support really helps!

God bless and thank you for your support.

Sincerely,

Congresswoman Michele Bachmann


From the Urban Dictionary:

Palinize:

To smear or mock someone using falsehoods, baseless accusations or unsubstantiated character assassinations for the purpose of blocking them from achieving a goal.

To exaggerate the truth or lie by omission.

To attack a person for his or her conservative values by focusing an inordinate amount of attention on a single example of that person falling short (or being perceived as falling short) of the values they espouse.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to wrap my head before it f$#%ing explodes.

I would note, however, that she does not give one of the more popular definitions from the Urban Dictionary, you know, something like, Palinize, "When someone answers a question without any form of intelligence or foresight. In an attempt to divert from giving a correct answer and in the process sounding unintelligible."